07.26.04

I had a dream the other night...

I had a baby in it... my mother was there, and I remember telling her that I was soo unprepared for the baby, that I didn't even have clothing, a nursery, or even a name for the child.. I had the baby with no pain.. I remember I was completely amazed at how it felt really no different than having my period.. and that I didn't know the sex of the baby, and the doctor didn't tell me.. I remember we'd decided upon Kara Jane if the baby was a girl, and we were arguing about what we would name the boy when the doctor finally gave us the baby, and we discovered it was a girl, so it didn't matter about a boy's name.. then next thing I know, we're checking me and the baby out of the hospital, and we've gone to pay the bill.. and I remember telling mom that I was broke, and I had no idea how I was going to handle school, work, and the child.. I was still up here in Jacksonville for whatever reason.. and in front of us in line was one of my parent's former neighbors (she'd moved away after her divorce).. we were all suprised to see her, and I showed her the baby (which was in one of those baby backpack things for some reason!), and she appeared uninterested, suddenly I noticed she was no longer in front of us in line, and that somehow she'd gotten behind us without me noticing, and was cooing at the baby...we got to the front of the line, and on the counter was a bucket with a bunch of keys in it.. they all said something about only being used once and then being unusable.... that's about all I remember about this dream, but it has stuck with me.. I found it very odd, because my normal dream buddy, Rob wasn't in it... and also, for me to be pregnant would be just impossible at this point..